Grammarian’s Look Away Now

A daft little poem to take our minds off Trump.



I stand before you ashamed, contrite,

amazed that I have the nerve to write.

When the drips from my pen are a major catastrophe,

otherwise known as the misplaced apostrophe


Mine come from a tin where the instructions for use

say ‘Sprinkle widely, dispense fast and loose.

Deny the charge of apostrophe abuse,

and let readers place them wherever they choose’.


I remember the fuss of ‘The Citizen’s Charter’

and whether the ‘ came before or went after

But if all we recall is political grammar,

then the words have no impact, only the stammer.


So stop all that dithering, just pick a spot

and don’t give a damn if they like it or not.

What matters is writing that transports the reader,

not picking the entrails, a carrion feeder.

Author: catch22andahalf

I’m retired, a grumpy optimist, writer, and shallow humourist. Before retirement my ‘career’ looks like it was cobbled together from a few different CVs - clerk, slightly more senior clerk, top notch clerk, Personnel Director before they downgraded the name to Human Resources, Advertising and Marketing Director, Partner in a management training outfit and owner of a small B&B

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